Archive for August, 2007

Through all the past years, I look at my/our life and am grateful that I still have -
a husband who loves me and is home with me

a mortgage free home

a paid for car

a pantry full of food

a library room full of books

a family of 2 sons – happy and successful

a lovely daughter-in-law (oh, like the sound of that:)

a wonderful group of friends and supporters

a medical/dental team -bar none – wonderful to both of us

a healthy body and my Man, also

a garden, quail, flowers, pool, hummers and lots of others

a cranky ache or pain here or there so I “keep real”

a fraternity of bloggers for whom I have great love and respect!

I could go on and on but you make your own list if I haven’t put you to sleep with mine:)

A feeling of loss overwhelms me when I need the smallest jobs done and my Man no longer can do them. Unbelievable, also, as the former self could do anything.

Sept. 18th I’m having a young fellow go over my list and get our house in ship shape. He is a former patient of mine and trust him completely. Steve came over to assemble our computer desks in 2001 – bells should have been ringing loud and clear when my Hon started the assembly and then just walked away. Guess there was a distant chiming but, as usual, stress??

In all my feeling sorry for myself, very lucky to know a trustworthy reno man.

This is one of my favorite pics of my Man although it’s of his back(side).

The evening we met, many moons ago, he told me he was raised in NS. All excited, I asked if he lived on the ocean. “No.”

Come the year I make my first journey down there, he takes me to the dock (long washed away) where he swam with his friends. Behold, water!

“Isn’t this the ocean?”
“No, the Bay.”
“But isn’t it the ocean?” I persisted – being raised on a bald flat prairie, I wanted to see ocean!
“Well, it’s Northumberland Strait.”

“That’s the ocean to me for heaven sake – don’t split hairs – I’m a prairie girl, remember, I want to see ocean.”

“Well, OK, I guess it kinda is.”

I told him years later that he came pretty close to being pushed into his non – ocean that day except for his wallet!

Over the years many articles are published about keeping your brain active by doing puzzles, reading etc.

I’m concerned about it all only because several people who we know with Alzheimer’s could not have been more active – physically and mentally. (Two pharmacists and my Man – accountant)

Personally, I feel it would be prudent (in any case) to live a full and active life but – some days I kind of rage inside.

Monica commented on the blog wondering how to deal with a family member having Alzheimer’s. All these entries on the blog are totally from a lay person/wife perspective so never to be taken as medical advice – it’s only what I think – so here goes:)

Treat the person with Alzheimer’s “as before” – don’t speak down to him/her.
Memories from the past seem vivid so find out what was important years ago and you will be able to always discuss something.

Don’t ask what he did today or what he ate for supper – my Man gets stressed out trying to remember and can’t remember minutes after the fact. (He is in mid-stage)

Phone often but keep the conversations short as that seems to be another stress (at least for mine)

Send or bring little gifts – favs here: beef jerky, books, candy, a bookmark – something just for him/her.

Arrange with the spouse to “drop in for coffee” and then either take him out for coffee/walk or a drive. Twenty minute alone is heaven and so appreciated.

Frame pics of family members – we keep a selection on our china cabinet in the kitchen – then just casually mention one or two.

Never take your eyes off the person if you go out for lunch – gone in a flash – personal experience:)

BTW, I don’t mean you have to bring gifts but a token is a big deal and so cherished – he will handle it over and over asking about it.

Anyone else have suggestions?