Through all the challenges of living with Alzheimer’s, I feel the most difficult is dealing with people who continually say, “He seems OK to me.”
Yes, he walks and talks and never fails to say thank you for every occasion.
He vividly remembers details from his childhood and about to the 90′s.
But when you doubt his situation, come to our house for a day – watch him try to function.
Watch him try to find the coffee mugs
Watch him try to find the fridge
Watch him go in circles when you tell him to look beside the unseen microwave
Watch him unable to find a room he wants
Watch him put on his leather winter boots in summer
Watch him come from the bedroom, unshaven, unwashed, un -brushed
Watch him put 3 shirts on
Watch him set the cutlery on the table
Watch him try to use the cutlery
Watch him feed the cat several times in a row
Watch him slumped in his chair in despair
Watch him and then tell me again, “He seems OK to me.”
7 Comments
You are touching on two aspects–one is the obvious inability of people to see the changes they are not exposed to daily; the other is the seeming ability to compensate that your loved one demonstrates. Careful observation, what you are doing, shows the real impact of this disease.
Thanks, Donna.
I clicked on your blog over at kgmom’s, and I have spent the last little while reading.
Alzheimer’s has not touched my family, so I cannot begin to imagine.
My son and his wife gave birth to my first grandchild last summer, and we were devastated to know that she has cystic fibrosis. While she is very well right now, the cloud hangs.
Thank you for your writing. I would like to link to you so that I can come back easily to read your posts.
Welcome Beverly – I’m sorry for your GrandBaby – Most welcome to link & I will.
As I always say, It could be worse and carry on:)
Jean, dear Jean. Your thoughts and words are so touching. People don’t know unless they deal with the waking hours from sunrise to sunset every day. Those hours are loaded with reminders of the challenge. I understand and hug you.
At my Mom’s funeral reception, everyone commented on how well my Dad was doing… but he was sipping his beer from a sipper cup. It was a once a year treat. They had no idea…
Thank you, Mary. I’m sorry for you, too. Luckily we are still together unlike your folks. Ah, so much to write about. How was your weekend? I weeded and brought tomatoes in.
Jean,
The weekend was wonderful but we didn’t do anything special. We shopped a little and worked outside in cooler air – finally. Had dinner at my house with daughter and her boyfriend (plus their two dogs).
Now, it’s hot again. Oh, well. It was nice while it lasted.
Holiday weekends are too short. I’m back to work already.