Archive for December, 2008

Slip sliding away – I “catch him” as he comes down the hall – wash his eye glasses while he does his face. Since M&M left, he has not wanted to wash his face – he agrees to the cleaning of his glasses. Yesterday he actually refused to wash, today he protested but I somehow “won”.

If this goes on, he may have to be tended by professionals. I can’t have him unwashed.

As I type this, I’m working on the bath time strategy for tonight – bless his heart. The RN wrote a note for him to bathe on certain days, penned in her direct line if he needed to talk it over. I show it to him and say he can phone if he disagrees – his comment is always the same, “Is Liz coming to visit?”

How can you deal with that? I usually laugh and tell him,”No, she’s sending Princess Anne.”
Anyway – it’s bath night – wish me luck!

Often wondered how I’d react if someone were to break into our home in the night – now I know – blood curdling scream.

Awoke to see a form standing by my shoulders – was deep asleep. Scream!

He jumped and I tried to not die of cardiac arrest. He didn’t speak. Once I recognized it was my dear man, relief flooded over me – until the “what if” scenarios started to flash thru my mind.

I checked around the house – all was well – think he probably had just got lost (on a bathroom call) and wanted to ask me how to find his side of the bed – maybe the bed period.

Afraid to go to sleep tonight although I guess it would be less traumatic a second time. May I add that Buddy, the guard cat, slept thru it – until the scream. He’s still clinging to the ceiling – - -

He looked over toward me and asked in a soft, questioning voice, “Is it Christmas yet?”

Moments like this tear at the heart – I answered, “It is, Hon. See our tree?”

It satisfied him.

My dear man is still sleeping – he had a great Christmas but is worn out.

I’m sitting on the sofa, coffee in hand, watching a heavy snowfall come down. Put the deck railing lights on and the tree – it’s really beautiful.

Wish I didn’t have to know, but wonder what 2009 will bring. Still have not heard back from respite planner – maybe that’s a good thing. I was awake this morn, looking at him sleeping so peacefully, Buddy wrapped in his arms. How can I put this man in a care facility with “no me and no Buddy” – for a whole week!

Anyway, I have decided to let “what will be will be” – if it’s destined he should be in for a week, they will call. I will let a Higher Power than I decide. What really concerns me a lot is the fact he’s never been in a hospital except as a toddler – once – tonsils.

Worry, worry, worry – it’s what I do best:)