Jean, does Wayne enjoy reading? When you sat in the alcove, did you read or talk?

I hope the prayer helps (both of you).

We (Dad and I) used to sit and eat with Mom in the Care Home at least once a week. (Dad went every day, of course, but I lived an hour’s drive away.) It hurt to watch her struggle with things; she had to be told, often, to drink her tea or juice, and she’d push things around on her plate without eating. But we put on a good front, and tried to make it a pleasant event for her, a bit of normalcy, the family eating together as always. She did seem to perk up as the meal wore on.

She also enjoyed walking around, inside and outside, then later (she had bad legs, from ‘way before) being pushed around in a wheelchair, and finding different nooks and rooms where we could sit and look at flowers or paintings or the gardens outside.

It was so hard, arriving and leaving. When we came in, she would rush to Dad and just stand holding him for a while. And when we left, she would stand by the door looking wistful. Dad eventually began to bring tapes and CDs of her favourite music and settle her down in her room with the music going, then say goodbye there. It helped.

I hope you two will be able to adjust quickly, then take what is good out of the situation. (Rest for you, wonderful staff people, social events? The local church came weekly for a service and a hymn sing. Mom especially enjoyed the singing, which she had missed for a few years, being unable to attend church.)

Is there a garden outside where you can walk, even in cold weather? Can you take him out for an occasional drive? It does help to get beyond the four walls, if possible.

Take heart! Life still has its joys.

I like Susanna’s thoughts and suggestions.
Prayers and hugs, Jean.