So asked my Hon to get me a glass of water from the fridge – try to treat him as “normally” as possible and “helpful” to me. Heard him pour water and then the tap filter was being run for quite a while. There were frustrated murmurings coming from the kitchen so I asked if I could help.
He had water on the counter and floor – not sure what happened there. Then he told me he couldn’t get the lids to fit. He had them mixed up for the water pitchers and lids.
I felt sorry for him so told him to feed the cat – that is something he can do if I set the food out, etc. He happily did that and afterwards, went to bed. I’m sure it wore him out – all the frustration.
If only I could make it better, my darling Man.
There is so much confusion about ” the clock” – yes, a clock is used as a tool in diagnosis and follow up but please don’t rely on “the clock“.
I have heard comments such as “Well, he/she can draw a clock so doesn’t have Alzheimer’s”.
My heart breaks to hear this. My Hon could draw a clock til about 18 months ago – and he had Alzheimer’s for several years while still able to draw a clock!
(1) Nutrition is important, quality nutrition. We have our share of “baddies” but overall try to excel in this aspect of our lives.
(2) Try to maintain medical/dental visits. It’s not easy! Something I do is go in the op with my Hon so he feels safe and comfortable. Our MD has even come out to the reception area and said, “Come on in” and Hon turns to me and says “What, me? Not me”. I tell him it’s the only way Dr.D. will be paid for writing the prescriptions (which is true). Then he relents. Have to say he is always happy once he’s in the op but then Dr. D. is so great and treats him so well.
(3) Clothes – “clothes make the Man” – I keep his clothes in perfect shape – iron things so he looks great. It’s important he presents well. Make sure he has everything he needs and more!
(4) Gently guide in matters of personal hygiene. This is so difficult an area but again, it’s so important. It is not easy and use whatever you have to for persuasion to “get the job done”.
(5) Always include him in family news and discussions – This is a gray area for if there is sad news I may not tell him til absolutely necessary. But, I never would let him learn from someone else.
(6) Exercise – a walk – my biggest challenge to get him to go.
(7) Humor – I’m lucky my Man has a great sense of humor still present today.
(8) Always tell him you love him and show you love him.
(9) Socialize but only with people who treat him “as before” and with whom he is comfortable! And you will know.
Walked into the bedroom with a pop for my Man. There was not a single area large enough to set the glass down (on the headboard or bedside bookcase) – so we both laughed. I lifted a set of 4 paper back books and 2 bookmarks from his bedside book stand to the chiffonier. As I did that, he said,”Hey, where are you going with my stuff.”
You could have heard a pin or pile of books drop! It was “softly” accusatory and so unlike him. Plus, he could see I was setting them on the last few inches of room available on the chiffonier.
Anyway, I explained there was no room for his drink so “I’m just moving them here til you finish and then I’ll move them back.” He was all happy and said “Ok”.
Writing about our life is very difficult because I didn’t know where to start. Hope I can give some info about what I’ve learned “the hard way” – for there were surprises around every corner – heartaches and happiness. We never ever knew where the path would lead us daily.
It’s crucial to arm yourself with every bit of info possible. I asked the library to order in every book they had on Alzheimer’s. A tidbit here and there from each book.
I surfed for web sites and will eventually post several excellent ones in the links. Googled for blogs about Alzheimer’s and found a fountain of info.
Write out questions to ask your medical doctor and geriatric MD specialist. Each doctor will have his/her own approach to dealing with the disease. Only you can make decisions after you have all the facts. I always go to our sons and others in my family to ask their opinions when “biggies” come up.
If it works for you, go to caregiver meetings. Each person has different approaches to dealing with their very new life.
***Something I did early in the journey is to tell people to please give me lots of feedback and ideas. Also told them that I may not agree or use their idea, but each one is appreciated.***
(Photo credit to my brother)